A Respectful and Stress-Free Move for Seniors – 5 Helpful Tips
Moving from one home to another has been cited as one of life’s most stressful events. In numerous surveys conducted on the subject, the results are often the same. Sometimes the scales are tipped to well over half of the respondents reporting that moving is one of the most stressful experiences they have ever had. It has nudged its way as more stressful than going through a divorce. There are so many pieces to the moving puzzle, it can be dizzying. One of the more stressful projects of a move is going through all of one’s belongings. And the distance of the move does not seem to matter. Whether the move is across town or across the country, every item needs to be accounted for. Should it stay or should it go?
The decision-making can be daunting. Just think about it. Every single item in your home requires a decision, from the toothpicks to the sofa. Is the item worth the associated expense of packing and protecting it from the rigors of the move? Certainly, for many belongings the answer is yes. For many more the answer may not be so clear.
Fast forward to living in a home for 30, 40 or more years and facing a move. Perhaps the time has come for your parents or other aging family members to move to a smaller home, apartment, or senior living community. For various reasons, it is an all-too-common decision among seniors. Years of raising a family, inherited heirlooms, hobbies, careers, and the treasures of life are evident in every room of the house and in all the corners of the attic, basement, and garage.
The inclination of well-meaning adult children is all-too-common as well: get rid of it. ‘What are you going to do with all this stuff?’ I hear that question posed all too often. Yes, moving is the perfect opportunity to downsize and moving to a smaller residence necessitates it. Keep a few key points in mind when offering guidance in the decision-making process to ensure that help is delivered with respect, and to alleviate stress.
5 Tips to Moving a Senior Loved One with Compassion and Respect
1. The ‘stuff’ is not just stuff. Some of it holds dear sentimental value. There are so many ways to preserve items without holding onto the item itself. Listen to the stories and discuss which preservation options would work best.
2. Many seniors have lived through the Great Depression. They view and value their belongings reflective of that time. Although you may have grown in up in the very house you are now trying to help empty, remember that these are the belongings of their lifetimes, not yours.
3. Some days may be more difficult than others as the myriad of decision-making continues. Focus your efforts on small sections and guage how much time is practical for your senior to spend reviewing at any time. Begin as early in the process as you can and build some additional time into the plan so that choices are not made in haste or feel forced.
4. Ask for permission prior to handling all their possessions. Allow your loved ones to make decisions to the extent they are able. Preparing items for a yes or no response may move the process along quicker while giving them the final say.
5. It may not be possible to take on a project of this size alone. Ask for help. Friends and family may be delighted to lend a hand. However, be sure that everyone involved understands the goals and expectations. It can tend to feel quite chaotic at times so be careful, too, of sensory overload. An objective voice and single point of contact may prove helpful. You may consider the option of working with a Senior Move Manager® who has the necessary expertise to work thoughtfully and empathetically with your loved one. S/he also has the resources to distribute belongings that will not be relocating to the new living space, alleviating you of that responsibility.
Senior relocation can be a challenging task. But by following a few guidelines with care and concern you can help your loved ones prepare and downsize, reducing stress and moving everyone forward with compassion and respect.